A Recommendation for the Husbands

My husband (and I as well) recommends one of the latest sermons in a series on 1 and 2 Peter at Mars Hill Church in Seattle. We were driving across the state and there were a couple times David almost lost control of the vehicle while listening. Just a warning: it is NOT your average Sunday morning sermon.

Marriage and Men

The Peasant Princess

David and I just finished up a sermon series in the Song of Songs. Or Song of Solomon, whichever you prefer=) It was entitled The Peasant Princess and it truly transformed our marriage. We have laughed at silly memories, we (okay, maybe I) have cried over past mistakes. David was probably just saddened. But more than anything, we have seen God expose major areas of sin in both our hearts (mostly selfishness) and have been challenged and changed. We praise God for this series. It is honest, very frank, but so so worth it. I encourage each of you to check it out!

doing your husband good

Girltalk has a great list of ways to do your husband good up at their site this week. I have to be honest: I don’t believe I have ever been so convicted by my own short-comings as a wife than after reading these lists. After reading how so many women are serving their husbands, I realize that I have no excuse, no matter how tired or busy I am. I am going to choose, however, to use that conviction to turn things around as opposed to condemning myself, which serves absolutely no purpose in helping me grow more mature in this area.

My favorite idea:

“Write love notes (G-rated, of course) in large sidewalk chalk letters in your driveway”

He he. I am just trying to imagine what kind of scene a note that was R-rated might attract to my driveway.

According to Plan

I just finished a message series by C.J. and Carolyn Mahaney, entitled According To Plan. It is a three-part series that has greatly enriched how I view my marriage to David. I encourage you to download it and listen for yourself!

can’t get enough of a good thing, can I?

Another great sermon from Voddie Baucham on Biblical Headship. From his website:

“Biblical Headship is a hot-button issue in both the culture and the church. What is a man’s role in marriage? What is a woman’s role in the church. What exactly is “headship” anyway? These questions and more are addressed in this message. Buckle up your seatbelt.”

Check it out here.

This is good stuff. And even better because it’s what I studied in my quiet time yesterday=) Enjoy!

great quote

on the topic of getting married at a young age:

“You wanna know why I got married? Here’s the deal: The wisest man in the Bible, the strongest man in the Bible, and the godliest man in the Bible all fell into sexual sin. For me to stay engaged to Bridget from the time I was a sophomore until I graduated from college was for me to expect myself to be wiser than Solomon, stronger than Samson, and more godly than David- and I was neither- so we got married.” Voddie Baucham Jr.

Ha! So great! I wish our church members and- dare I say- church leaders would remember that when we teach our children that a college degree is more important than a marriage.

Baucham then went on to say that when we teach our children that, then we teach them to make other things higher priorities than their marriages for the rest of their lives.

The Not-So-Newlywed Game

If you didn’t already know, David and I were contestants in our church’s rendition of The Newlywed Game, affectionately titled The Not-So-Newlywed Game. It was a blast. We were the couple who had been married the least amount of time.

At first, things were looking good. We went into the half winning…50 points! Of course, those were the questions David answered. I have to defend myself, however. Those were the easy questions. A few examples:

1. What was your husband’s worst home improvement disaster? His answer: busted pipes in our master closet. My answer: busted pipes in our master closet!
2. What was the cheapest/worst place that you and your husband ever spent the night? His answer: Howard Johnson/ Knoxville, TN/ cigarette burns in our sheets. My answer: Howard Johnson/ Knoxville, TN/ all-night frat party…same difference!
3. How did your wife define the word obfuscating? (By the way, it is a real word, that means confusing) His answer: the opposite of confiscating. My answer: a type of robbery or theft. Ahhhh!!! I think we should have gotten partial credit as we both heard the word confiscating.

Well then round 2 came. We blew it…big.

Some examples of round two madness:

1. Which Gilligan’s Island character did your husband say you would say you were most like? A. Ginger (the hottie who likes to look at herself in the mirror), B. Mary Ann (who would be most likely to cook up a fabulous meal), or C. That rich lady (I can’t think of her name)? His answer: Ginger (his reasoning was that I love to shop and I always try to be up with the latest trends). My answer: It was Ginger, but I thought everyone there would think that I thought that I was a hottie (LOL) so I flaked out and said Mary Ann because I like to bake. Ugh…
2. What perfume does your wife wear? His answer: VS Rapture. My answer: VS Rapture! (Might I add that NONE of the other husbands knew what perfume their wives wore!)
3. Whose parents did your husband say were easiest to get along with? His answer: her’s. My answer: his. We still don’t really know why we said the answers we did. We both had reasons. He said I always disagree with his mom about money (but I still love you, Dee, if you’re reading this!) and I picked his mom because we talk to her almost everyday and anytime we have a question about anything she is the first person we call. And…if we’re just being honest here…it is no secret that David and my mom have had their “disagreements.”
4. If your wife were a sea creature, what sea creature would she be? The answers don’t matter. Are you serious?! Who would get this right? BTW- I said dolphin. He said starfish. What?!

Some pictures I thought you might enjoy:

“Dr. Love”- our emcee (is that how you spell emcee?)

All eyes on me…that makes me nervous!

Carl and Carol: such a funny couple! Carl is our UPS man. You can’t see it, but the shirt he’s wearing says “What can Jesus do for you?” Great shirt! They were the only couple we were concerned with beating. And we did! They came in last. We came in next to last.

Things are getting serious now. I think this is the Ginger vs. Mary Ann question and I am so torn…

And I got it wrong!:

Such a fun night. If you are involved in the hospitality/social ministry at your church (as I am) I would totally suggest this game to you. I have lots pointers and sample questions if you are interested!

A Tribute To My Sweetie

I saw this on someone else’s site and I thought it was really sweet!

1. Who is your man? My hubby is Nathan David King (for some reason I cannot get this un-bolded).

2. How long have you been together? We started dating March 20, 2001. So…that puts us at 6 and a half years=) WOW!
3. How long did you date? We still go on dates LOL, but for the purposes mentioned here- we dated for 6 and a half months before we got engaged and then we were engaged for 8 months exactly. So- we “dated” for 14 and a half months.

4. How old is your man? David is 28.

5. Who eats more? Ooo…interesting question. David eats more, but healthier. And I eat junkier, but less. So it evens out=) He likes to steal what’s on my plate, however, when all his healthy junk doesn’t fill him up!

6. Who said “I love you” first? *blushing* It was me, I admit it. And I meant it. I think. It was early in our relationship. When I look back on it, it was VERY early. I must have been caught up in some romantic whirlwind LOL. My sweet boyfriend at the time, however, was just that- sweet. At the time, he said “I’m sorry, but I am not going to tell you that I love you…because I don’t. I care very much about you and that is why I am not going to tell you those words until I mean them.” Isn’t that so chivalrous?”

7. Who is taller? David, but barely. I am 5′7″ and he is 5′10″. When I am in my stiletto boots, I am taller LOL.

8. Who sings better? He he…is neither an option.To be honest, however, probably me. I love to sing and the more choirs I become a part of (with the simple intention to drown into the background) the more I learn to sing. I have gotten better, but not great! David, well, he tries.

9. Who is smarter? hmmm…I think I am very book smart. I had a high GPA in school and won many awards and scholarships. But David is intelligent as well and has me beat out on common sense any day of the week (I am the blonde remember). These days I feel like he is much smarter than me, however, because for the first time ever I am not in school. David has the awesome gift of thinking of things on ways that I never could. He also always has the most amazing illustrations for sermons. I am always like “Wow!”

10. Whose temper is worse? It used to be me. Now, thanks to me, it is both of us. That is a bad combination during a high stress moment.

11. Who does the laundry? Me. He helps fold sometimes. He washes some of his own things if I haven’t gotten them done by the time he needs them. Neither of us irons- except when it has to be done!

12. Who takes out the garbage? Both of us.

13. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? If you’re facing our bed, it’s me. I like to sleep on my left side. And I DON’T want me face in his as I sleep. If we are at a hotel, I like to sleep on whichever side has the coffee table.

14. Who pays the bills? That’s my job. I am not the best at it in the world, but I am frightened to think of what our financial situation would be like if he did it. That is not because he is bad with money. It is more an issue of how little time he does have to do those kinds of things.

15. Who is better with the computer? I think we are equal. But I can’t list items on eBay and he can so…I guess he wins *sigh*. No wait! I can do web pages and digital photos better than him, so maybe I’ve got him beat!

16. Who mows the lawn? We don’t. We rent and our owner knows how intimated by the sizes and inhabitants (LOL) of our land we are, so he hires someone to do it. When we buy a home, he will do it, I am sure. He likes to do the man stuff.

17. Who cooks dinner? I do. But David insists on making all his own breakfasts and lunches. I can’t quite do it the way he likes it. The boys and I are waffles and cereal people and David has to have bagels and egg whites. Sheesh…stuck up breakfast hubby, eh? Oh…and his lunches- they range from elk stir fry to elk fajitas to shrimp…you get the point. Here we are with our destitute PB & J’s. LOL.

18. Who drives when you are together? Almost always, David. He thinks it’s the man thing to drive. He once said he didn’t want other people to see me driving when he is in the car with me LOL. Oh yeah, he also thinks that I am 100% incapable of driving. He says he wonders sometimes how our kids are still alive.

19. Who pays when you go out? umm…him? He makes the money LOL.

20. Who is most stubborn? Oh, it’s me, of course. I am as stubborn as they get. I can’t help myself though. It’s because I know I’m right and I just so much want everyone else to know that too. LOL. I am so kidding. Except for the stubborn part. It IS me.

21. Who is the first to admit when they are wrong? Even though I am the most stubborn, David will NOT admit when he’s wrong until he has had a while to think about it. I am difficult to budge as well, but if you are able to convince me of it, I will say I was wrong then and there.

22. Whose parents do you see the most? Usually it’s David’s because his mom has the means and ability to get here easier. We have seen them pretty equally this year, however.

23. Who kissed who first? David kissed me first LOL. We were attending a college that was very big into the whole “kiss dating goodbye” deal and nearly NO ONE was dating. We were sitting on a couch watching a movie and he said “Do you think it’s bad to kiss before you’re married?” to which I replied “Umm…no…I don’t.” LOL.

24. Who asked who out? He begged me for months to go out with him LOL. Maybe it wasn’t months, but it was at least a few days…or hours?

25. Who proposed? umm…David LOL=)

He came to pick me up on a Sunday evening after I had driven back from home that weekend. My mom (!!!) had leaked to me that he might pop the question as David had called my father to ask his permission that same weekend (this still peeves me to this day). When he came to get me at my dorm I was so nervous that I just kept saying “I have chemistry homework and I can’t leave til it’s done.” He was incessant, however, and I didn’t have much excuse as I had been watching Sleepless in Seattle and only doing my homework during commercials. We left and all the Resident Advisors were giggling because they all knew he was going to propose. He had the ring in his sock (of all places) and was petrified it was going to fall out. He ended up proposing in the parking lot of the dorm and then later that evening (after I had gone to all the dorms to show off my ring!) he sang the song that he had written and had originally intended to use to propose to me. It was too cute=)

26. Who is more sensitive? David, David, David.

27. Who has more friends? me.

28. Who has more siblings? me. I have a brother, a sister, and a new brother-in-law. David has a brother and a new sister-in-law.

29. Who wears the pants in the family? *sigh*. This is one of those questions where you want to give the Bible answer and move on. Unfortunately though, I can still struggle with the tendency to resist my Biblical calling to submit to the leadership of my husband and follow what he feels is best. While that is the norm, I still really wrestle with this one. When I am obedient to God in this area of my life, I can see the blessings. However, when I don’t (Daisy being a perfect example), I face the consequences. Just being honest here! I think it’s a gradual learning process that I am getting better at every day. But, yes, David wears the pants in the family=)

30. What’s your favorite thing about your man? David is always growing. I love his heart for the lost and for those who aren’t growing spiritually. He is absolutely hiliarious. He makes me laugh so much. He is wise beyond 28 years old. Combine all these things- what I think I love best is that so many people throw David off as a shallow youth minister who likes to have fun, doesn’t have a serious side, and is rather messy with his office. I love, however, that I get to see what others don’t. I know who he really is- inside and out. I see what a great dad he is. I see how intelligent he is. I see his heart. And that is so special to me.

A Lesson In Submission

22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.Eph 5:22 (NASB)

Ok, humility really isn’t one of my downfalls. Sure, everyone is prideful and I am no exception. However, when I know I have acted out in a sinful way or I feel as though I am failing miserable as a wife, mother, pet-owner (rolling eyes), among many others, I am usually the first to admit it.

This post comes with great difficulty, however. I must say that to tell each of you about this is very humbling and very VERY embarrassing.

God has taught me in the past few weeks the value of submitting to my husband. I usually have no trouble trusting what he says is best for us. And so in the past I have never had to pay the price for any decisions that I have made because I have trusted my husband’s leadership. One Saturday afternoon, however, I flopped. Big time. And now I am paying for it.

I got a dog. We didn’t get a dog. I did. I had called David that afternoon and asked if we could have this precious puppy that no one else wanted. He said he would love to have a dog, but the timing was bad. We couldn’t afford a dog. We had no place to keep a dog. And he said he was looking in my best interest when he told me that he didn’t think I could handle a dog on top of my already-established, and much more important, responsibilities.

I was sad. I wanted a dog. Everyone was telling me that the boys needed a dog. So I got sneaky. The dog had been abandoned and she was very afraid. It was obvious: she needed love. I told the owners that we would take her home to play with her for a few hours and I would bring her back that night. Secretly, I knew it wouldn’t work that way. I knew when David saw the dog, he would want her. He’s a sucker for cute little puppies. I knew it and I played on it. I told him that I didn’t bring her home with the intention of keeping her, but I think deep inside I knew we wouldn’t take her back.

Reluctantly, David agreed to keep the dog, provided that we restructure the budget and it doesn’t keep him awake at night. Fair enough. He has to get up at 5:30 and work all day. At first we all had that initial “puppy love” deal going on. But as time has passed, I have learned David was right.

This dog is awful. I know she is just a puppy. But she howls all night. She pees and poops all over the house. They say a puppy won’t pee or poop where they sleep. Not Daisy. She does whatever she wants. Every morning I am stuck cleaning up more poop and pee than I ever have with my kids.

Let this be a lesson to all who read: God’s way is best! David knew I couldn’t handle that dog. I made a sinful decision and now I am reaping what I have sown. It stinks (pun intended). I want to give her away so bad but we all agree that we can’t bear taking her to the pound where she could possibly be euthanized. I suppose our best bet now is to try to make her an outdoor puppy. But that is difficult when she could easily be eaten. We’ll see.

My husband knows how repentant I am and this is a lesson that will stick. I am quite certain of it.

The Hubby and I

I just love him. And this is one of my favorite pics of us ever. That rarely happens. One of us always dislikes something about ourselves in a photo. Yay for small miracles!

P.S. I’m still not goin for the Top Gun sunglasses though;)